Pages Navigation Menu

Find your soul mate.

Waiting To Adopt: Six Productive Ways To Pass The Time

Posted by on Jul 16, 2015 in Uncategorized | Comments Off on Waiting To Adopt: Six Productive Ways To Pass The Time

The process of adoption can take time, with classes and home study, paperwork and other preparations, you could be waiting a while before your new child comes home. This is a wonderful opportunity to prepare yourself, your home and everyone in your life for the precious arrival. Here are six highly productive ways to spend that waiting time. Understand The Forthcoming Journey While welcoming a child into your life is a very emotional experience, the adoption process itself is complicated and sometimes arduous. It is in your best interest to consult with a number of resources in order to become fully educated and therefore, fully prepared. Know what will be expected of you, the steps required for completing the adoption, and estimated costs, and if possible, learn everything you can about the child you will adopt. Additionally, be ready for the investigation into your personal life which will involve a background check, credit report and other important elements of your qualifications as an adoptive parent. Have Long Talks With Your Partner If you’re adopting as a couple, you need to know each other as parents before the child arrives. Above and beyond the fact that you obviously both want a child, find out how you each stand on various issues. Discuss different scenarios, such as discipline, education, chores and other responsibilities and what each of you would like to take care of pertaining to the child. Quiz each other on hypothetical situations, using the conversations to fully comprehend the unique perspectives you have. Involve Any Children You Already Have In The Process As overwhelming as adoption is for you, it’s going to be quite an adjustment for any kids you already have as well. Keep them in the loop and ask for their input on things like decorating the home, situating the yard for safe play and so on. Depending on the ages of your existing children, involving them will help them adjust and develop a kinship with the adopted newcomer. Steady Your Nerves Avoid overthinking to the point of stressing yourself out. Sure, this is going to be quite an emotional journey, but you risk running yourself mentally ragged if you obsess over every little thing. Adoption is simply another way of building a family, and as such, you should feel comfortable once you are fully prepared. Find ways to relax and enjoy the anticipation, rather than being overwhelmed by it all. Build A System Of Support Friends and family should support you through adoption, the same way they would through a pregnancy. Kids change everything in your life, so ask the people who care about you to become involved to make life easier and more enjoyable for everyone. Plan for a night for yourself every once in a while, or an afternoon of child-free shopping and a visit to the spa. Arrange for play dates with cousins and neighbors of the same age as your adopted child and be prepared to be more involved with your community, too. Libraries, story hours, festivals and more will offer your growing family a fun and nurturing way to bond. Work On You Keeping up with a child of any age consumes so much of your time and energy, it’s important that you are physically prepared. While waiting for the adoption...

read more

Understanding How A Disruption Will Affect Future Adoptions

Posted by on Mar 12, 2015 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Ideally, all adoptions would be positive experiences that result in healthy, happy children and parents. Unfortunately, the adoption process can be an emotional struggle that does not end the day a child is placed. 6-11% of adoptions are disrupted before they are finalized, and the percentage becomes much higher when the adoption involves older or special needs children. If you, your family, or your adopted child are struggling with the new adoption, it is highly recommended that you seek professional help as opposed to disrupting the adoption. However, if you do decide that you need to disrupt or dissolve the placement, it is important that you consider how your decision will affect your adoption process in the future.  Understand the Difference Between Disruption and Dissolution  Disruption is the term used for when an adoption is ended after placement but before it has been legally finalized. The process of finalizing an adoption can take weeks or months. If you end the adoption during this period, you will have no legal obligations to the child. However, if you wait until the adoption is finalized, you will have to appear in court to dissolve your rights as a parent and you may owe child support to the child.  Both disruption and dissolution can raise a red flag if you choose to adopt again in the future. If the adoption is disrupted, it may appear that you did not try long enough to allow the child to adjust to your home environment. However, the legal implications of a dissolution can also hurt your chances of a second adoption. While neither situation is ideal, it is important to remember that neither a dissolution nor a disruption will prevent you from adopting again in the future as long as you handle the situation with the child’s best interest in mind.  Take the Proper Legal Steps  When you end an adoption, your lawyer should be involved as well as the adoption agency. You should be sure to document any time you contact the adoption agency for assistance as well as any medical or mental assistance you have secured for the child.  It can take time to dissolve an adoption, but you should avoid the temptation to complete an illegal private adoption. If you can no longer care for the child without harm to yourself or others in your home, then you should talk to child protective services about placing the child in emergency care.  Decide Whether You Will Remain In Contact With the Child  After a disruption or dissolution, the child may have bonded with you, even if it does not seem like it at the time. This can make it difficult for them to adjust to a new home setting once they are adopted again. You need to decide whether you will remain in contact with the child when they are placed in foster care or adopted. Although the ultimate decision for how much contact you can have with the child will be made by the new adoptive parents, you need to know how much communication you will be able to continue and be honest with the child about this.  Give Yourself Time to Reflect and Heal  Once an adoption is ended, especially if it ended for negative reasons, you may experience an array of...

read more

How Putting Your Mother-In-Law In Charge Of Your Bustle Can Help Your Relationship

Posted by on Dec 18, 2014 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

It is common for brides to worry about their future in-laws. Whether their mother-in-law will like, or at least accept, them, or whether she will be overbearing and disrespectful of boundaries are concerns many brides feel at some point during their engagement. These concerns are not unfounded as 60% of married women say their relationship with their mother-in-law causes longterm stress. However, even having a future mother-in-law you adore can be concerning, as a recent study found that women who rate their relationship with their future mother-in-law as positive before their wedding are 20% more likely to end up divorced than women who had neutral or negative relationships with their in-laws.   The statistics can be disheartening, but there are several things you can do as a bride-to-be to get off on the right foot with your mother-in-law. One of the things you might consider is inviting her to help you get ready for your wedding, either by helping you dress or do your hair and makeup. If you want to reserve this time for your close friends and family, consider letting her be in charge of bustling your dress, to give you a few intimate moments during the reception to help reset your relationship.  Set Boundaries  If a bad relationship can cause personal stress and a positive relationship can cause divorce, what kind of relationship should you look for with your mother-in-law? You should try to have a respectful relationship with clear boundaries.  These boundaries can start while you are planning your wedding, and giving your mother-in-law the task of bustling helps you keep these boundaries while still letting her be involved. Whoever bustles your dress should attend at least one fitting with you, to be shown how to properly compose the bustle. However, this is usually a later fitting, which allows you time to make important decisions on your own and show your mother-in-law that you are capable of managing your life.  Let Your in-laws Help You  In many countries, such as Turkey, India, and Pakistan, it is traditional for the bride to be painted with henna before her wedding. The ritual is reserved for female members of both families, but it is usually the mother-in-law who does the actual painting, to show her acceptance of the bride. Henna is a time-consuming art, and the bride is often required to sit still for several hours while the paint dries and sets. During this time, she is dependent on her in-laws to bring her food and drink and continue making wedding arrangements for her. This shows the intimacy and dependence between females of these families.  While bustling your gown will not take an entire evening, it does take about ten minutes out of your reception and allows your mother-in-law to have a specific task that shows she cares for you and accepts you as a daughter-in-law. While your first inclination may be to give this task to one of your close friends, consider giving it to one of your in-laws to help build trust and intimacy.  Show Respect for Your New Family  In a small village in Bulgaria, the bride-to-be has her entire face painted white by her female in-laws. The bride then has to keep her eyes closed until the couple is blessed by a religious official. It...

read more

5 Tips For Enhancing A Custom Wedding Album

Posted by on Dec 13, 2014 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

One of the more important keepsakes from a wedding is the photo album. These photos will last for numerous years and reflect on the memories of that special day between you and your spouse. When you decide to create custom photo books, you have the ability to set the layout and design for every page of the album. This gives you the ultimate artistic freedom. With so many wedding album options, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. Use the following five tips to enhance the overall look and design of your album. Each step is easy to follow and can be completed with any type of wedding photography. Detail Shots Flipping to page after page of portraits can get boring. It’s important to highlight the details of your wedding with detail shots. Including a variety of detail shots will help you remember all the work that went into creating a wedding. Look through a wedding photo checklist to determine what detail shots you want to include in your album. Food Detail Shots: Include a couple of pictures of key food items like appetizers, the wedding cake, or customized creations for the bride and groom. Bride Details: Add in some close-ups of bride details including special jewelry, shoes, and hair accessories. Location Details: Shots of the location help create a narrative of the experience. For example, if it’s a beach wedding, a detailed shot of some shells in the sand can help capture the mood. Perspective Shots The best wedding albums tell a story through the images that are chosen and the placement of those images. For pages that detail the ceremony, it’s a good idea to include different perspectives on the events that are occurring. For example, an album page can feature an image of the bride first walking down the aisle. An image right next to it can showcase the groom’s reaction. Together, the two pictures capture the moment and present a touching scene. Use the same methods for other moments during the wedding. Consider including crowd shots or emotional parents reacting to moments. Full Page Photos Save some of your best images to place in an album as a full-page photo layout. After going through pages with multiple images, a full page photo can have a huge impact on the viewing experience of an album. The best types of images to use for a full page include wide portraits. Examples include the bride and groom standing at the altar with everyone looking on, a first dance photo, or the bride’s bouquet getting tossed into the air. limit the amount of full page photos you use so they will have the best impact. For example, if your album is 20 pages then stick to three or four full page photos. Backgrounds It’s easy to get carried away with all types of patterns, colors, and wedding designs, but often the pictures will stand out on their own. When choosing backgrounds for your album design, you will want to keep it as simple as possible. If you want to stick to your wedding colors, then choose a pastel version that is not too bold. For example, if your wedding colors were yellow and gray, a pastel yellow would look nice as the background. If you do not want to use your...

read more